{photo by Dan Gold}
What phones do to in-person conversation is a problem. Studies show that the mere presence of a phone on the table (even a phone turned off) changes what people talk about. If we think we might be interrupted, we keep conversations light, on topics of little controversy or consequence. And conversations with phones on the landscape block empathic connection.
~Sherry Turkle, in Reclaiming Conversation: The Power of Talk in a Digital Age
Many agree that family dinnertime at home is an important time to keep devices put away. But what about when you eat out? This week’s mini-challenge offers a twist on keeping phones from hindering conversation while sharing a meal:
When you go out to eat with friends, family, or your spouse, keep your phone put away, on Do Not Disturb, and try to get through the entire meal without checking it. Does this sound difficult? According to our summer book (Reclaiming Conversation), social manners have changed because of technology, and not necessarily for the better. We don’t always expect the undivided attention of others when eating out, because everyone has their phone nearby, and meals are often interrupted by them. Enjoying a completely phone-free meal allows conversation to go deeper, and nurtures relationships. Despite the slim possibility of an “emergency,” most likely no harm will come from not accessing your phone for an hour or so, and much good will be invested into the people you care about.
Obviously the best results will happen if everyone sharing the meal agrees to do this! To encourage a phone-free meal when out with a group, you could try the phone stack dinner game that is mentioned in the book…
Have you tried this when eating out? What did you think? Was it harder than it sounds? Was it beneficial? Leave a comment below.
